WoRd FrOm HeArT :-)

if only i could choose to go back in time...
i'll choose not to let u know me...not making u ever fall in love with me...
not because i dont love u...not because i dont want to be with you...
but, coz i know...how much i love u or even how much u love me...
we still can't be together...
if only i could...
i want only me..who love u and u don;t...coz i know...
i can't reach u now even i saw u leaving in front of me...
there are too much things that shows i'm not entitled to be with you..
too much...
even i want..really want to make u happy with me...but i dont know..
u know how much it hurt...??
then, i'll tell you how it was...
at the moment i saw u with the other..i feel difficult too breath... i try to control it...but i couldn't do it till the only wish i have on that time is...Allah, tke thiss ache...mke it disappear even i have to end up my breath..
when i saw u laughing with the others and not me...i just feel that something goes wrong...but still i'm happy to see u laughing..even it's not because of me...
and when u mad at me...i just too worry and regret if i'm the reason why u became like that...it's too hurt till no word can't explained...
and one time when u ask me not to find u anymore..
it's like my world end...it's too hard...
i cant sleep thinking 4 the whole night...till i've tke tke painkiller to mke me fall asleep...
and that mirning when i woke up...i had an ache due to that things..it's too painful till i thought i couldn't see u anymore...
when i saw u that morning...i'm afraid to see your face...not because i'm afraid of u...
but just because i'm afraid i couldn't do the things u ask me to when i see your face once again...
the question that i still thinking right to this moment is..is it my fault that i love u..? :-)
is it a fault if i want to make u happy..??
or is it wrong when i'm too worry about u until i can't even think about myself..??

p/s: i keep praying now.."Ya Allah...klau saat ini Engkau tentukan aku dah xmmpu mnjga dia...tlonglah jga dia utk aku..sbb aku dh xpcyakan org lain utk jga dn buat dia bhagia melainkan Engkau..aku lihat penderitaan itu, aku jugak lihat kekeliruan itu..dn aku mohon ringankn skitnya, dan hilangkan sakit itu jika dia layak...sbb sesungguhnya...aku terlalu cintakan dia..:-) " -menangis aku lepas doakn nie....no word can explained this...